You asked.

And I will now answer, in rough order of receipt:

emmyinabox – Do penguins have knees?

Yes, Emmy, they do. They have patellar bones under all that leg-fat, even though they walk as though their legs were solid little sticks of cuteness.

dig-the-cat – Do you recall why you started following me? (Actually I’m now going to ask this as a question to everyone…)

Actually, you were one of the first handful of “strangers” I followed, outside of people I knew in real life or already knew through other internet outlets. That was about a year ago. Now that I think if it, it’s rather odd that we’ve never had any direct communication until just recently. Don’t you think?

badarama – Do you remember your dreams? Ever had recurrent dreams? Do zebras remember their dreams?

I often remember bits of my dreams, and used to log them quite regularly, because they were often amazing story fodder. Lately my dreams are extremely vivid, with recurring themes, but they’re boring. Ridiculously boring.

As far as the zebras go, I don’t know if they dream, but they snore. Oh dear god how they snore.

srslainey – How much stalking is too much? Subquestion: Why are your blinds closed?

You can never stalk too much. And the blinds are closed because you’re looking at my neighbor’s house. I don’t have blinds. Or curtains. You fail at stalking.

cleversimon – What do you consider your greatest accomplishment? What is the greatest thing you hope to accomplish?

My greatest accomplishment is being alive in the 21st century. I’m not being flippant. Think about how many countless generations of my ancestors had to avoid predators and disease, be healthy and attractive enough to mate, and generally just survive long enough to perpetuate the chain of events over thousands of years that resulted in me simply being here. Is it a personal accomplishment? No, but I think it’s an accomplishment just the same.

The problem is, that chain of events ends with me. I will never procreate, and so the greatest thing I hope to accomplish is to produce creative works that will have some lasting meaning; something that will do even a tiny bit of good in the world and leave a small trace that I was here, and that I mattered.

jessabelle2o7 – When was the last time you felt like you’d failed as a human being, and why?

I feel like I fail every single day.

I say that not in a self-pitying way, but in the sense that we all, as people, fall short of what we’re capable of each and every day. Failure is how we learn, and I embrace it. I do fall into the trap of being overly self-reflective sometimes, but I understand that failure is fertilizer for growth.

ravenlll – why do giant female animals have 3oz babies human women have ginormous babies. seems hardly fair.

It’s all about litter size. See Arndt von Hippel’s Human Evolutionary Biology text for more insight on this issue.

daniellei – How do you keep yourself focused on writing when there are all these bright & shiny objects around (twitter,tumbler,myspace <—- just kidding!)

It’s a challenge. It truly is.

I focus when I need to. One of the benefits of doing what I do is that I’m not tied to an 8-5 schedule, so I can be productive at any time. The downside is that I’m always at work; nights, weekends, holidays. I don’t have “days off” in that sense. But the Twitter and Tumblr stuff is a “happy distraction”. It charges me creatively and lets me interact with the kinds of people who keep me “up”. It can be really distracting, and yet it’s also a huge mental boost for me when I need it.

gordonshumway – What piece of art (be it book, song, flick…or tweet) do you wish you’d created?

I wish I’d created the entirety of Carl Sandburg’s Chicago Poems.

Specifically, Bath.

opalandtheidiot – what’s on the shelf?

I have lots and lots of shelves, so it’s hard to say. But a tiny sampling is here.

timestolen – When did you realize writing was your “thing”?

When I was quite young, probably well before the age of ten. I’ve always identified myself as a writer; it’s not just what I do, it’s what I am. Though one of my greatest regrets to this day is that I didn’t pursue it as a full-time vocation until I was 30.

rachelarogers – Any characters in literature that you aspire to be?

I’m fairly happy being me. Though for a short while during my youth, I identified quite closely with Holden Caulfield. Though, what boy didnt?

These days, I wouldn’t mind spending some time in Bertie Wooster’s shoes. It’d be nice to spend most of my evenings in state of inebriated comedic bliss, with a Jeeves always at the ready to get me out of trouble and soothe my morning hangovers.

yellowsuitcase – What’s your favorite word? What’s your least favorite word?

I wouldn’t say it’s a favorite word, but I like “actually”. It is grammatically useless, yet I use it quite often, as I’ve adopted it as an idiosyncrasy—a sort of verbal tic—into my writing style.

The list of words and phrases I hate is far too long to touch upon here. Though I reserve a special brand of loathing for the word “utilize”.

melissasantos – is it possible to know something for sure before after the fact? wait … no, i think that’s what i meant.

You’ve been watching too much Lost. Next question.

redcloud – What do you remember about your first ever cup of coffee?

I started drinking coffee around my senior year of high school, but I don’t remember actually liking it until college. So the “first cup” experience is lost to the mists of ancient days. Pretty sure it was like beer or liquor, though, insofar as it was something that I didn’t really love at first but drank for the effect. Whereas now I drink it just because I love the taste and can appreciate a good cup from diner swill.

yhf – Had the green room at Arrive Having Eaten been physical rather than imaginary, what would you have taken from it?

Oh, but it is physical. And in fact, I already took something from it – an ashtray. You see, before taping my podcast segment, Ben and Erica were having a huge fight about smoking. Erica was all “I have aaaaaallergies, wah wah wah..” and Ben was all “I’m gonna smoke these Djarums anyway, bitch.” So I took the ashtray rather than let them continue on in that fashion. I hate conflict.

brilliantorange – Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Just kidding. Don’t answer that. I hate that question.

Yes, that was quite an original question. All I’ll say about my future is that I hope to be living somewhere else in five years.

MsInformation – What is your favorite coffee, and what is the Official Delgrosso Brew?

My favorite local coffee (i.e. what I make at home every morning) is a Viennese roast that I get from a little shop called Parkleigh. I buy it whole-bean, a pound at a time. And the Official Delgrosso Brew is Stella Artois.

posted 4/6/09 at 11:02am to Uncategorized · 0 replies · »

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